My husband was my heart my soul my life. Since I was fifteen years old, this man held my heart and was my world. We built our future,  made our family, followed our dreams.  How could I fathom such a notion that he wanted a separation. My brain couldn’t wrap the thought around it, my heart couldn’t feel the hurt. It was too uncomprehensable, too overwhelming.  Never in my life had I been suicidal or ever even had a suicidal thought until now. If I didn’t have a precious life growing inside me I might have contemplated running my car into a tree. That is not me, not in any way shape or form. But this thought  surfaced.