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My first four children did not have namesakes except my grandfather’s name for my son. But when I envisioned children with my new man…I wanted to honor him and give him a namesake…a junior…a second. Then he shared his middle name to the other woman who was to bore him his first born son. My heart was once again torn in two. No longer will our child in the future be a namesake, a junior, a second. I will never forget where I was and how I got the news when my boyfriend called to tell me he and “her” had found a name for their child. How much pain should I take? Is this something I can really love him through? Am I open enough? Am I strong enough? Time will tell, so until then I continue to love.

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